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Tag: life

I am just

I am just a simple man,
A man who doesn’t always say the right thing,
Who doesn’t always know the right thing to do.
A man who cannot always express himself
Like a gifted speaker
Who sometimes stops
And starts when saying something.
Whose words sometimes like torrents flow forth.
A man whose emotions sometimes overwhelm him
And then like a fool degrades himself
Before those for whom he cares
And forever he then carries a burden of guilt
Of some imagined wrong.

I am just a stupid man,
Who doesn’t always see that someone cares.
Who feels a numbness for the outside world,
And an emptiness within.
Who doesn’t believe that love exists,
For him, only others.
Never for methat simple happiness
Of love requited.

I am just a wanting man,
Crying out for someone to care.
A lonely voice it seems to me,
For no-one answers.
Am I alone?
And you, will you heed my call?
Please.

15/05/1990

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Cause of Anguish

Colours run through my mind
Lights, shapes, memories
Are all I have now
Of a once complete consciousness

Stability no longer exists
Since she came
At once my mind became restless
Until it became divided

My soul stretched out to her
My shyness fought against nature
My actions were no longer mine
My thoughts were confused

I knew it would happen
For me loneliness evermore
But my mind cannot endure it
Please, please help…

30/04/1978

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When in the rebellion of mens eyes

When in the rebellion of mens eyes I am alone,
I have a warmth inside that gives me life.
When in the hatred of men’s thoughts I am in danger,
I have no fear for you are with me.
When in the anger of men’s fears I suffer without sound,
I feel no anguish for you strengthen me.
When in the blackness of men’s hearts I stumble blindly,
I worry not for you are there to guide me.
When in the dungeon of men’s dreams I am a captive,
I am in peace for your love frees me.

26/08/1989

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The Selfless Flame

The candle in the corner splutters and dies
Fading slowly to dimness
Casting strange dancing shadows on the walls
Until it is engulfed by growing darkness
And only a glowing ember is left
Where its life used to be
And then that too disappears
Just the smoke remains
Forlornly forcing its way heavenward
And then it too is gone
And all is left in cold blackness.
Who had warmed their frozen hands
Around this self-same flame?
How many children had played late at night
In its warm and friendly light?
How much was done
Whilst this candle gave of itself
Unselfishly, unceasingly
Using what it had only for others
Until all was consumed
And it left us alone with the dark
The cold and lonely dark

04/08/1992

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But they’re not

Yes, there are many people
But they’re not you
And yes, they are beautiful
But they’re not you
They may be good company
But they’re not you
Yes, I have some friends
But they’re not you
And yes, they like having me around
But they’re not you
And they may love me
But they’re not you
Yes, I have my family
But they’re not you
And yes, they too love me
But they’re not you
And I have a father and a mother
But they’re not you
Yes, there are many people in this old world
But they’re not you
And yes, there are many that I’ve not met
But they’re not you
Many that I could get to know
But they’re not you
Only you are
You

04/08/1992

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Prophet of a Lesser Age

He sits square-framed and lies to me
With words of hatred and deceit.
He speaks of honesty and truth
As if they were unwanted foreigners
And talks of war with pride.

He wants me to kill, he says
It is only right,
It is our duty.
We have no need to fear, he says.
Then why am I afraid?

He talks so easily of the hell of war,
Of destruction, of others deaths,
Of the faceless enemy.
He talks of hate, he talks of evil,
He talks of suffering for his cause.

But I want peace
And he will not give it,
But I want love
And he cannot see it,
But I want freedom
And he doesn’t understand it.

Am I then an enemy?
Am I then to be imprisoned?
Am I then to be tortured?
Is my cause so wrong?
Then why does it seem so right?

Oh, answer me these questions
You square-framed man.
Answer me with honesty,
Help me understand,
Why I cannot love.
And yet I know you hate me
As you hated all the others
Who came before me.
But as I go to die now,
I do not fear you, I pity you.

You square-framed man…

17/01/1990

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For Many Years Have I

For many years have I
Alone wandered
On the uneven path
Of my life
While the darkness devoured me
And my fears assailed me
And my guilt besieged me
I would cry on the wind
But no-one heard
I would scream to the stars
But no-one cared
I would shout to the emptiness
But no-one came
And on I walked
Isolated
Desolate
Scared
Scarred
Longing for the greater night
To overwhelm my tired soul
And end the pain

07/02/2018

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